Space Age Sun Tanning

For many, many, many and I do mean many years, I was unable to tan. This year on a lark I decided to invest the money and try again. I was tired of being so white that I glowed in the dark under a black light. Not joking. My legs were almost clear. I threw caution, money and skin cancer to the wind and started going to a tanning bed place.

I gave myself one month. If I had no results in one month, never ever would I try again. One month later, I amazingly had a very light base tan. So I gave it one more month. Woo Hoo! My body was darker. Now I know that some out there can tell me exactly how unhealthy it is to tan. I have done the research. Save your breath. I don't care. About myself that is. Life to me is too short. I am trying to do everything in my life that I have always wanted to do. There is something surreal about approaching 40. You suddenly realize that life ends quickly and you missed out on half of it already. Because it flew on by while you were sitting there watching television or on a computer. But I digress.

I received a coupon for a new tanning place. Five free tans you say? I will be right there, because tanning is expensive and I will take free stuff. The bed in this place were like space ships. Seriously. They contour to your body now. I'd like to see a special bed made to contour my fat ass. Maybe then it would be tan all over, not just where it thinks it should be tan.

Not only is it like walking into a space age tanning site, they finger print you now. Just one step closer to the microchip in your skull. Keeping tabs on us. Believe it? If not, maybe you should. The young lady there was very helpful. Funny as well. She was impressed with my fingerprint skills. She told me to move my finger up and down on the pad four times. So I lifted it up, four times. She then proceeded to tell me how others will just slide it up and down. Versus lifting it up so the light can actually get your fingerprint. Obviously, none of those people have been to jail. Or possibly color their hair too much?

Either way, it was nice to be fingerprinted for something legal. LOL